So I made a reel. It was 11½ mins long. Average watch time: 1:30. So here's a 1:30 reel! So here I am in my 30s, wondering what life has left for me. I'm on disability I can't hold a regular job like everyday people, yet I'm a jack of all trades in pretty much just about everything but I've always been a really good thinker and absorber of not episodic shows but more mythological or para-(fringe)-science, or well built world building type TV shows like Lost or Dead Like Me, Fringe for example, True Blood even 12 Monkeys with their perfect oroborus of a show at heart, and you can't say Ouroboros without mentioning Loki of course. There's His Dark Materials - the Proper BBC version of the attempt at what was "The Golden Compass." the one with the talking polar bear. Yes that one. That would be an Alithiometer, 1 of only 6 mind you, that Scholars dedicate years to interpreting; Not Lyra Silvertongue, no she just that she's using that uses the power of well I'll call it his dark materials, they call it dust and we call it dark matter; and she is not riding a talking polar bear she's riding a Panserbjörne. Witches, Æsahættre, Sky Iron, The Magesterium, The Authority, spectres, dæmons, your death, r u watching yet?? So I decided instead of trying to get in to movies by way of acting auditions which is a life of heavy no's, why not just M. Night Shyamalan yourself into your own movie or show and go to film school! During one of the classes that we took, one of the assignments had a student read a self-help book as I did myself, and he had everybody write down what they loved doing most as a child. The point was to correlate what their childhood desires were to their adult life outcomes. Mine was "I always loved filming everything." I guess I was always meant to be a filmmaker... After all, my first two semesters were straight A's, and I managed to impress the President of New York Film Academy in NYC enough to change a whole assignment.... But life's tricky like that, you see, because everything everywhere all at once was not just a fantastic multiversal Oscar winning movie, it is also a perfect description of where to find the symptoms and or problems and or pain located on my body and where literally every single ish hit all available fans. I mean from my neck down to my toes, nobody knows the fear that grows, underneath my skin all up in my nose I swear w/my soul that with each day that passes by my future is unknown. I'm calling it my mid-thirties life crisis, cuz pretty much right now I'm at the point where I get about 20 minutes to walk, and then if I have ice packs 20 minutes to sit like you know drive home after shopping, both before I am in utter and complete Agony which I happen to be very good at hiding apparently, (that's on-par with being told after a date that I'm very stoic, to which I promptly looked up the definition of - you know one of those words you've heard a couple of thousand times in your life you kind of just let it go until you get called it, so I think a proper definition was due. Now that word just reminds me of statues, unable to express but only one emotion forever. Sorry, what? You possibly may or may not just be confusing that with my exceptional poker/perma-bitchy resting face to hide the F7 tornado that I call my working mind spinning rampant with never-ending thoughts of what ifs and why nots. And that was before my body decided to take the year off, functioning wise. Back to shopping and stoicly hiding my extreme pain:) except for the odd stretching I had to do just about every minute to try to get I don't know space between my bones or maybe something to crack to rid me of some pain before I give up and just check out with whatever I have. I tell you just be grateful anyone who's reading this, that if you drop something and you can pick it up in under 5 Seconds? Be grateful. If you can just get out of bed and go? Be grateful. To have not a sliver of doubt in you; that you have finished going number two? Be effing grateful. If you can still shampoo your hair, brush your teeth, make it somewhere on time, if you can go 24 hours without feeling like you want to rip a piece of your body literally off because you're in so much pain it's just unbearable yet you still stand determined to return to a normal life and you don't have to? Be grateful. you really never know what life will throw at you next. The journey in life can be as easy as a green circle bunny ski slope, as bumpy as the off-road shortcut, as residential and full of speed bumps every 30 seconds, or just Spike strip after Spike strip. It's up to you how to handle it. And unfortunately, the only way out is through. With that being said, I'll see you when I'm through. #ShortFilms #Shorts #StudentFilms #ShortFilm #NYFA #NewYorkFilmAcademy #CityLife #SchoolLife #FilmLife #LivingTheDream #Director #Actor #Writer #Producer #Cinematographer #Film #FilmSchool #FilmSchoolLife #Filmmaking #BFA #FilmmakingBFA #School

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